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15 Tips on How To Get a Thigh Gap Fast

Looking for Heaven on Earth? You've Found It.

Thigh gap vs no thigh gap: it’s not even a question! Male or female, tall or short, young or old, everybody knows we all look our best** with a little sunlight peeking through our legs.  In fact, the benefits are manifold:

  1. Let’s just admit it right up front: you look hotter with a sizable thigh gap.  Why did miniskirts and short dresses become so popular if not because of the way they allow any woman to simulate a gap?  More recently, skinny jeans for guys have finally allowed men to share in the joy of slim-thigh satisfaction.
  2. The extra space creates the illusion of longer legs, which is proven to be more attractive (in both sexes!).
  3. Due to the way light bends when it passes objects, thigh gap makes your thighs look skinnier than they are, in one of nature’s kindest optical illusions.
  4. Having that extra space also keeps your private parts fresh, due to greater air exposure (men, it also helps you regulate the optimum temperature for production of, uh, cells).
  5. No more chafing! This makes running/walking long distances easier and less painful.  Plus, your clothes last longer!
  6. People will compliment you all the time! Granted, they’ll use words like, “Wow, be careful: if a wind picks up, you might blow away!” but we all know that they really mean: “Damn, girl/dude, I covet your self-control!”
  7. The feelings of power and success will cause your body to release endorphins each time you see your reflection—a totally legal high!

Keeping these amazing benefits in mind, in this article you will learn how to achieve that noblest of goals: to get a thigh gap in record time.

The Ingredients of a Successful Gap

The process of obtaining serious gappiness isn’t easy, but it IS simple: all you need is the right combination of

  • Thigh gap diet
  • Thigh gap exercises
  • Thigh gap mentality
  • Thigh gap hacks

Let’s look at each of these in turn.

Thigh Gap Diet

As stated previously, not every step to an impressive thigh gap is easy–but each is simple.  In fact, the diet required to achieve and maintain an epic thigh gap is so simple, it’s a little ridiculous.  Some readers may even have noticed that it’s hidden in the name of this article.  That’s right—the fastest way to a thigh gap is to … FAST!

Think about it: if you don’t have an inner thigh gap, why don’t you? Is it because you lack wide hips? Perhaps because you do a lot of leg exercises?  Haven’t reached puberty?  Unfavorable genes?

NO! It’s because you EAT.

Fasting is—duh!—the fastest way to achieve the perfect thigh gap that’s been eluding you for all this time.

Of course, not everybody has the strength of mind and body to fast.  Here are a couple of tips for those who can’t quite measure up:

Food ... or this?

Food … or this?

  • The Devil Wears Prada Diet: Emily summed it up perfectly: “I don’t eat anything; and right before I feel I’m going to faint, I eat a cube of cheese…. I’m one stomach flu away from my goal weight.”
  • The ABC Diet (it stands for Ana Boot Camp, so you know it’s legit): Eat anywhere from 0 to 500 Calories per day, on a strict schedule.  For example, on Day 9, you get to eat an indulgent 500 Calories, followed by a day of fasting, then easing yourself back into eating by consuming 150, 250, then 400 Calories per day.  The 50-day plan culminates with a celebratory fast on the last day, just to punctuate the glory of your newfound gap.
  • The Pro Ana Diet: in a quaint but effective spin-off of the “Keep Calm” franchise, this one really delivers the wisdom: Keep Calm … and Stop Eating Until they Take You to the Hospital.

Because, seriously, why eat when you know you’ll just get hungry later?

Thigh Gap Exercises

As of right now, your new motto is “Train insane or you’ll remain the same.”

Your insane training is going to look like this: choose only upper-body workouts, like push-ups, arm-wrestling, and putting your hands in the air at concerts (be careful with this one!—if you wind up bouncing up and down at the concert, do so using only your calf muscles).  Do NOT use your upper legs when you exercise.  You don’t want ANY gains in the thigh area, including muscle.  If you come across stairs, look for the elevator.

Believe it or not, that’s all it takes! A pretty sweet and doable workout plan, wouldn’t you say?

As an added bonus, these exercises increase the size of your chest and arms, which draws attention away from your legs, making them appear thinner (and your gap wider).

Thigh Gap Mentality

You have to want this.  No, strike that—you have to NEED this. Or your thighs will never gap. Reach deep inside and CHOOSE THE GAP.  Anything less is choosing to lose.

Admittedly, we’re all human.  So, in moments of weakness, when you need inspiration, consult the following helpful gems:

  • Skip dinner, end up thinner.
  • Your stomach isn’t grumbling—it’s applauding.
  • Nothing tastes as good as thigh gap feels.

Thigh Gap Hacks

  1. Wear jeans one or two sizes too small—it’s like a corset for your thighs!  The resulting Muffin Top will be a small price to pay for the extra snugness in the legs.
  2. Use smaller dinner plates, so you think you’re eating more than you are (if you’re one of those weaker thigh-gappers who can’t fast).
  3. Wear perfectly applied lip gloss (men, lip balm is fine).  It makes you more aware of what’s going in your mouth.  Also, wear fruit-flavored gloss—you’ll trick your body into thinking you’ve eaten!
  4. Remember: drinking 2 cups of cold water on an empty stomach can boost metabolism by 30% (for several seconds!).
  5. Better, taking a bath in icy water will burn massive calories, as your body tries to warm itself up.  Shivering is exercise without the effort!
  6. If all else fails, or if any of this sounds too difficult, you can always invoke the nuclear option: stand with your feet further apart. Boom! Instant thigh gap, no matter what.
  7. Finally, saving the best for last, we offer the one Pro Tip™ that beats everything else, the method that WILL take your Thigh Gap® to permanent, otherworldly levels: learn to do the splits. Then hold the position.

    Jean Claude Van Damme Splits

    Nothing but sky between those thighs.

Conclusion

The problems of the world will take care of themselves.  The problem of your touching thighs will not.

Do you want a truly fulfilling life?  A life where people respect you for who you are, and seek your wisdom?  Do you want to help others escape from the perilous conditions they’re in?  Do you seek instant sainthood, or dream of world peace and harmony?

Of course you do.

You can have it.  All it takes is a little determination.

Your resultant thigh gap will take care of the rest.

** And now a word from the TRYIS legal(ish) team(ish):

This article contains parody and satire. If you don’t know what that means, read the comments below. To read a more serious answer on how to get a thigh gap (warning, prepare to be disappointed), read Ms. Dahl’s acclaimed book on healthful weight loss practices and mindset, The Real You Is Skinny.

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About Alyssa (56 Articles)
Author of The Real You Is Skinny (the cult weight-loss book) and several professional publications which have been well received but would bore you to death, Alyssa Dahl loves writing about health and weight loss. Since writing TRYIS, she certified as a Clinical Weight Loss Practitioner and decided that this website needed to happen. She also occasionally says silly things on Twitter (@AlyssaMDahl) and loves to answer questions and comments---so please leave one below!
Contact: Website

17 Comments on 15 Tips on How To Get a Thigh Gap Fast

  1. I LOL just about every time I read this. The irony is so strong! Shame that some people actually thought I was serious.

    What a world we live in. :-/

  2. Whew…I thought you were serious.

    • I’m so sorry I stressed you out! I thought that I was being so strong, so ridiculous, that it would be more obvious. Do you think it needs a change?

    • I am a little confused. I am a girl and I am 13 years old and it kinda hurt to read this because I am trying to get a thigh gap and when reading this I thought that you were serious, and I was considering doing this and starving myself until I scrolled to see your comments saying you were just joking. I would say you should delete this before someone takes it too far a lot of people don’t get the irony.

      • Hi Caroline, and thanks for commenting!

        I’ve had a look over the article, trying to see how I could change it to make it better for my audience. The thing is, the ENTIRE THING is satire (I mean, thigh gaps for guys? Light bending? The noblest of goals? ARM WRESTLING? LOL). If I toned it down, nobody would read it. By keeping it as ridiculous as possible, I believe, I am helping people realize how ridiculous the idea of working for a thigh gap is. Sometimes people won’t recognize truth until it smacks them between the eyes. It’s those people I’m trying to reach.

        Just for you, however, I’ll amend the article at the end to let people know that they’ve been had, since it’s not obvious to everybody. I appreciate your concern. Much health and contentment to you!

  3. I think you need to make it more clear that your messing !
    I’m a ed recoverier and I came across this and it’s shocking !
    Just simply put in your not serious in some things .
    Great post tho after I found out you were just giving the myths

  4. Concerned survivor // May 10, 2017 at 9:39 am // Reply

    This is obscene and dangerous. Either delete this crap or add a post script at the end to make it more clear that you are joking and that eating disorders are extremely dangerous and encourage those suffering from them to seek help because this is the kind of thing that a 13 year old girl suffering from anorexia could come across and absorb completely.

    • Hi, and thanks for your concern. I was of the impression that my final photo, showing a martial arts expert doing the splits between two SEMI TRUCKS, was ridiculous enough that no reasonable person would believe this sh*t. Feel free to inform me of any demographics sufficiently swayed by my satire that victims have resulted.

  5. Hi Alyssa,
    Just read your article and saw that you said it was fake at the end. I don’t think if you say it’s ridiculous it will stop people from doing it. I mean those tips are still real, right? I think most people who truly use this stuff will just scroll past your warning and use this anyway. It’s not like others haven’t warned them before. The idea behind this article is good, but those people just don’t care how they destroy themselves.

  6. Dear Lilith:

    Thank you for being so lovely and caring. The world is better off because of ppl like you (no irony here, I’m being 100% serious).

    I read your comment, and then I re-read my article. I have to admit, I laughed out loud several times, because I forgot how ridiculous this article is. Most of the “tips” I give are things I once read on pro-ana sites. I include them because they’re so insane!

    There are different ways we can reach people who have unhealthful goals. We can coddle them, we can try to reason with them, or we can mock them.

    My hope is that this article, which falls quite within the “mock” spectrum of responses, will serve to reach those people who won’t listen to the coddling or the reasoning. I pray that the humorous spirit in which I wrote this will uplift their weary souls, after coddling and reasoning have failed to do the same.

    If I’m wrong, please forgive me. In the meantime, I think I’ll try to reach ppl through this unorthodox method.

    Much <333 to you, and to all.

  7. I thought it was great! I mean, no legitimate for “health or tips” especially body weight, mind you, website; is going to display what society sees as unhealthy, for people to follow. I totally get this and I love it. I got hooked with your enthusiasm here and confident comments omg don’t get me started! 🙂 Enjoyed so much I want a copy. hahaha

    • Haha, FINALLY someone gets it! Thanks for the feedback, and feel free to keep a copy for yourself or to share (with a link to the original, of course). <333

  8. I’m a 12 year old girl and I was taking this seriously and found this really scary and disturbing and I really wish you would consider changing the title to ‘Thigh Gap Myths’ because eating disorders is a big problem in this country and i just dont want anyone especially around my age to take it to seriously.

    • Hi Holly, and thanks for your feedback. I have a question for you: the article starts in its first paragraph implying that thigh gaps look good on old men, and ends with a picture of a man doing the splits between two commercial trucks. Still scary, or obvious joke?

      • Hi, she clearly states that she was taking it seriously, and she’s only 12. I understand that it is satire, and I read it as such, although there was a little doubt in my mind as to whether or not you were joking. I still felt a whoosh of relief at the end of the article.

        I suffer from an eating disorder and despite knowing it was irony on your part, I still took note, because much of what you said (not all, I don’t think thigh gaps have any effect on how good or bad old men look) I resonate with and believe, in a twisted way.

        So you see, even though I know you wrote this article in the hope that people probably who are like me, or not as far engrossed with destructive behaviours, or others just feeling bad because they’re trying to conform to a stupid societal trend would see common sense and stop, you did, in my case and maybe others actually worsen the situation.

        The reason being is that even though I knew you were being ironic, every time I read the quotes it just cemented them further into my head, irrationally of course. But knowing its irrational doesn’t help.

        Your sole purpose seems quite a noble one, to help people. If thats genuinely your intention then I would consider taking down the article as it seems to have had the opposite affect.

        Furthermore, a 12 year old nearly believed it. What do you think will happen if a 10 year old, or an 8 year old find this article? At that age, they haven’t always developed the skills necessary for deciphering when somebody is being ironic or sarcastic. Eating disorders among preteens and children is an increasingly common problem.

        I understand why you’re getting defensive as your intention was good and many people haven’t acknowledged that, just criticised. The problem I think arises because you made a very human error in assuming that everyone thinks the same way you do, when really the same experience you have had could produce an entirely different thought process in someone else who has a different genetic makeup, was raised in a different environment, is a different age etc.

        Its commendable you tried to help people, but the effect has been slightly detrimental, not through any fault of your own, so if you do want to help people, maybe take down the article or at least change the title, as Holly suggested.

        Hope you have a nice day.

        • Thanks, Annabelle. In response to your note, I removed the category “Diet” from the post. It’s now just “Fat Politics” and “Just For Fun”. I also added two asterisks, in bold, to the first line of the article, which should help lead more people to the note at the end, and the row of tags including “parody, satire, irony” and so on. May your day also be great.

  9. I was actually doing this method, starving my self, thinking “it brings to me more satisfaction to see my tiny waste in the mirror than the satisfaction of eating something wich contains a lot of calories” to lose weight, and it actually worked.. and then i was looking for tips on getting a thigh gap and came across this article.. I really thought it was serious, an i thought “gosh, i was right, and im not the only one using that method of starving my self!”, although, as long as i was reading i felt something was really wrong with the article and I was wondering why it wasn’t banned from the internet or something… Anyway i liked your advise, maybe you should consider mentioning the fact that you are joking before getting into the article because someone (like me) could easily be led to an oposite understanding of what you are stating..
    girl from Greece, 14 years old

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