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“Dear Fat People”: Rude but True?

Decide for yourself (but read this first)

Obese man juggling food

The recent uproar over comedienne Nicole Arbour’s Youtube video is as predictable as it is nauseating.

Although she swears a lot, she does it for effect, and it is effective. She never attacks fat people, she merely points out that, hey, obesity isn’t okay! See for yourself if you haven’t already:

The crazy thing is, she mentions only the 35% obese people, and leaves out that 68.8% of America is overweight.

Hello, world, “overweight” is not a social condition, it’s a medical condition! It doesn’t mean “Bummer, I don’t look as cute as I could if I lost weight.” It means “My body is NOT built to be able to handle this much fat, and I am harming myself every day I remain overweight.”

I try to keep it positive, especially on this site, but sometimes I feel like I need to be the little kid crying out, “The Emperor has no clothes!”

And you know what, as far as I’m concerned, calling out the problems with overweight IS positive:

Someday soon I’ll make a separate blog for these kinds of discussions. For now, please just keep positive–truly positive–by continuing to strive to make yourself the best version of you that you can be.

In health,



[About a week later]:


I was premature in jumping on this bandwagon.

I think I was just so excited that, for once, someone voicing an opinion other than “Big is Beautiful!” was finally receiving some attention.  In today’s crazy world, it is often elating to read or hear something that contains common sense rather than propaganda.

In hindsight, I feel somewhat ashamed that I supported someone who said that fat people smell like sausages (IIRC, I watched the video only once).

In Conclusion

I’m grateful that this woman brought to the forefront of modern media the plights and faults of a huge class of Western citizens.  Does Nicole Arbour speak the truth?  I have to go with the “yes” answer on this one.

But: does she HELP?

Sure … except in respect to those people whom she hurts more than she helps.

Will I fault her for it? No, I will not.  She’s entitled to her opinion as much as the toxic SJWs are entitled to theirs.  Each has valid or somewhat valid reasons for clinging to their claims.  If you disagree, you’re probably an enemy of free speech.

Will I fault myself for thinking it was a good idea to reblog this video with an affirmative opinion?

Well, actually, yes.  In part.

Those of you who know me know that I built my own success, and I help others achieve their success, on positive, health-embracing thoughts.  Overweight and Obesity? Absolutely a problem.  The Cure?  Healthful choices that lead a person to escape from the vices of such conditions.

Shaming others to rethink the reasons, and results, of their overweight and obesity?   Ugh … within limits, it can help.  Sometimes, each of needs a “wake-up call”.

But once we’re awake, many of us need more.

I’d like to offer you not only the wake-up call, but also the “more”.  If you’ve read The Real You Is Skinny, you know that the “more” of my story far exceeds the “wake up call”.

I’ve spent, literally, thousands of hours trying to help people who, like I once did, have no idea what to do and how to help themselves.

I care.

About you.

Accordingly, here’s my offer:

  1. Forget about the past
  2. Forget about the present, too.  It will soon be the past.
  3. Decide who you want to become.
  4. Become that person.
  5. Rely on TRYIS to be there for you along the way.

That’s why we’re here.



Comments? Questions? Please leave either, below, or start a new thread in our Forum!  This site is nothing without your engagement.


About Alyssa (60 Articles)
Author of The Real You Is Skinny (the cult weight-loss book) and several professional publications which have been well received but would bore you to death, Alyssa Dahl loves writing about health and weight loss. Since writing TRYIS, she certified as a Clinical Weight Loss Practitioner and decided that this website needed to happen. She also occasionally says silly things on Twitter (@AlyssaMDahl) and loves to answer questions and comments---so please leave one below!
Contact: Website

2 Comments on “Dear Fat People”: Rude but True?

  1. I watched this video as well, but as much as her words made sense I couldn’t help but feeling sad and a little angry about it. I’m no psychologist, but you can’t tell me that “fat people” are that way because they want to be. Rather, there has to be a more complicated social/psychological reason that food becomes the means to an end — even if it’s an untimely end.

    Point is, if you’re the type of person who turns to food to feel better — even when you know it is killing you — you are probably a victim of much more psychological stress than any of us “normal size” folks can even imagine. A psychological state that I can’t, in any wildest dreams, imagine that an online video tirade of “you-should-know-better-and-you’re-a-total-F*-up-for-not” would help me to grow beyond and believe in myself enough to change my weight and my future.

    Yes, fat sucks; but so does the mindset that leads fat people to believe they are worth nothing more than fat. And videos like, “Hey Fat People” do more to perpetuate that believe that fat people are worthless than they do to encourage those same people to believe they have the power to be so much more.

  2. Hmm…….. This is well written and thoughtful.

    My original post wasn’t. Honestly, I was merely excited that this subject was receiving national attention. I may have been a little swept up in all the commotion.

    I’m going to edit my post and add something to this effect.

    Thank you, so much, for taking the time to share your heart, and for doing to with 0% antagonism. The world needs more people like you. <3

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